How do you approach a first appointment with someone who you have never met?
“A first appointment with any specialist or therapist is bound to stir up emotions for us, whether you walk in trembling or if you enter like you own the place. Few of us are unaffected by that experience of waiting at a door or desk for the first time. And then, when we finally navigate the waiting area and meet our clinician for the first time, what happens?”
In his article on navigating a first appointment, quoted above, Adrian discusses the diverse range of feelings that people may feel when they arrive for an appointment. And it’s not necessarily just for a counselling appointment – think about how you feel turning up at the dentist, doctor, osteopath or solicitor.
Feelings might include anxiety, shame, worrying that your fears won’t be taken seriously or believed. Might you be seen as attention seeking? Foolish? Are you worried that your condition might be something life threatening? Or might you feel relief at talking about something at last and gratitude for some help. Perhaps you see the clinician as an employee whose job is to relieve your suffering. You’ve diagnosed yourself with Dr Google and want someone to give you the prescription or treatment described. Or does this bravado mask a deeper anxiety?
Adrian suggests that a way to tackle this is to bring your feelings to conscious awareness. How DO you feel? If you can express those feelings to the clinician it will help them to help you. Unlike cats, we don’t have to rely on body language – we can speak! You might say “It’s quite normal for me to cry/squirm/get words wrong,” for example, or “I might come across rather as being rather rude, but I am eager to explore what you can offer,” to help the clinician understand where you are coming from.
We take a holistic approach to your care and the more we can understand about what’s going on in your life and how you feel about it, the more we can help you.
By Counsellor Adrian Tupper
Feature Image by Dekanda from Pixabay